Or rather, I got dressed and got my backpack on ten minutes ago.
I walked out my door, down the stairs.
And while crossing the street, I noticed a black cat staring intently, yet cautiously keeping it's distance from a something near this telephone pole.
Then I noticed a man lying across the curb next to this telephone pole.
I also saw that he was smoking a lot of pot.
Upon closer inspection, I realized that no, he wasn't smoking at all. He was just trying to set the telephone pole on fire.
And doing an awful job of it.
I considered asking him, a la Sam Wilson, why are you doing this?
But visions of physical violence and having to run to safety steered me well clear of this.
Instead I pulled out some carrot bread I bought yesterday and tried to figure out if this warranted calling 911, or just the non-emergency number.
This is the kind of thought I often find myself having.
And in the midst of all this internal confusion, a parking enforcement guy rolls up in a chessy electric car right in front of me. I wave him down and he stops ten feet away. I wait, thinking he'll drive up the difference. Seconds pass. He doesn't move. So I walk up to him and explain:
Hey, there's a guy playing with fire over on Baldwin in front of the elementary school. Do you know where that is? Yeah, I think he's trying to set a telephone pole on fire or something.
And I stare at his face, and I realize that unprepared is actually an emotion and I'm looking right at it.
If the day gets any wierder... oh, this calendar says last night was a full moon. Good to know, good to know.