February 11th, 2001

(no subject)

i have all this semi-massive backlog of unposted thoughts... i haven't yet figured out how to put it up....... it should be fun, though...... i intended it for a blogger-less 0064.org, but i've kinda had a good experience with livejournal so far... <sigh> i'll figure out later today... it'll come to me or something.. =)


I saw Tromeo and Juliet—my first Troma film since Toxic Avengers—with Quinn last night. Yeah, I drunk for the first time in a while too. I was desperate for anything to happen. . . something different, something new, something violent, something cool. =)

So I tried half-heartedly to help customers at Ben & Jerry's, drive very recklessly (though that's not new) and when I almost ran over a group of Bethesda YUPs in the parking lot by B&J's and they were all &8220;HEY! SLOW DOWN!!&8221; and I really wanted to pick a fight, but instead I just keep talking about sex cause I was hungry for physicality. . . but the most fulfilling thing was that I got to do my first shiatsu treatment on Quinn.

But really I'm not sure what to make of it all. I kept thinking my restlessness was just my, Quinn and Asa's dynamics. (He bailed out early as—if you knew him and his social life—would be unsurprising.)

But it's all about this magically delicious moment Lauren and I had on the phone. A kind of special moment we haven't had in a while. That coupled with remembering some character defining moments from earlier in my life put me in that outspoken and half-crazy mood.

I need to move on from more than just Lauren, it seems.

I'm writing the most frustrating and promising things down at the same time. So, whatever.
I just want to be myself more.“Want some cheese with that wine?”

I'm narrowing down and acquiring out some songs to make a mix tape wit' today. Gonzo-like: I push the record button and don't stop talking, spinning or making noise. Fuck, I'm doing a lot today I feel the need to do, but I really really really just need to do spend a lot of time on work. <sigh, again>

What it is...

I'm unsettled by the norm – uncomfortable being on top of things. Of living a fucking ordinary life; it's just not for me.

And with that said, I'm gonna go shower and stop repeating myself over and over again. I hate mindless, irritating repetition and I've been doing so much of it recently.

LiveJournal - Like yummy crack for all of your countless insecurities.


I cut my fingernails so I could do my shiatsu homework: 5 people's pericardium meridians

But now I can't scratch myself worth a good goddamn. Grrr, I say, grrrrrrr.